Using Coercion and Threats
Making and/or carrying out threats to do something
to hurt his/her partner. Threatening to leave the partner, to commit suicide, to report the partner to welfare.
Making the partner drop charges. Making the partner do illegal things.
Using Intimidation
Making the partner afraid by usinq
looks, actions, or gestures. Smashing things. Destroying the partner's property. Abusing pets. Displaying weapons.
Using Emotional Abuse
Putting his/her partner down. Making him/her feel
bed about themselves. Calling him/her names. Making the partner think he's/she’s crazy. Playing mind games.
Humiliating the partner or making the partner feel guilty.
Using Isolation
Controlling what the partner does, who he/she
sees and talks to, what he/she reads, and where he/she goes. Limiting his/her outside involvement. Using jealousy to justify
actions.
Minimizing, Denying and Blaming
Making light of the abuse and not taking the
parnter's concerns about it seriously. Saying the abuse didn’t happen. Shifting responsibility for abusive behavior.
Saying the partner caused the abuse.
Using children
Making the partner feel guilty about
the children. Using the children to relay messages. Using visitation to harass the partner. Threatening to take the children
away.
Using Male Privilege
Treating the partner like a servant and making all the big decisions. Acting like the “master of the
castle”. Being the one to define men's and women’s roles.
Usinq Economic Abuse
Preventing the partner from getting or keeping a job. Making him/her ask for money. Giving him/her an allowance.
Taking his/her money. Not letting him/her know about or have access to family income.
Courtesy of the Domestic violence Intervention Project, Duluth Minnesota
